Wednesday, September 17

maybe I just shouldn't set goals.

So about a week ago, I investigated and decided I wanted to do the ultimate 1/2marathon plan from Runner's World. I overlapped it onto my buckeye outdoors log and started following it. Rearranging some of the days to coincide with my work schedule. Today was supposed to be 6-7miles (rather, yesterday was). But today I headed out to the gym and attempted. And now instead of being happy that I got my butt off the couch and ran 4.5miles. I'm sitting around beating myself up for not running the 6miles. Does this ever happen to anyone else? I feel like such a quitter when I really did try. My ipod died at 5.01km and I had to start over after walking for a few minutes reprogramming the ipod and then I couldn't stop walking. I only completed another 2.3km before throwing in the towel. AH. So frustrating. I know I need to keep with it and I will start seeing improvements. But I really think that 2week break was NOT helpful. I don't have much fitness to begin with and that was just killer.

So the next day I run I'm supposed to do this: 2 miles. 5-7x1:00 AI, 2 miles Now I know that the AI is an aerobic interval meaning I'll run 5-7 times at a faster than normal pace for oooh.... now that I read that, I thought maybe it was 100yards and I was going to ask how far that is on a treadmill cause I'm not good with simple math. But that means one minute. I can do that. I suppose I'm supposed to take a break in between AIs. And I bet I warm up and cool down with 2miles at maybe...5.3? We'll see how I feel.

I'm taking my gym bag and I'm hoping to get to the pool this afternoon for a swim. Did 1150 yards on Monday. That went well. I felt all fishy. The last four laps I experimented with how I hold my head when I breathe and I angled down a little and had my cap in the water. I felt like I was slicing the water and felt faster. Too bad I'm not prepared enough to actually time myself. I wonder if my watch is water resistant? Hmm.... eh.
Yesterday no workout, took a mental health day from the gym. Spent most of the morning and afternoon crying, haven't done that for a while. I guess for those of you that don't know, part of the reason I'm attempting this whole running/swimming thing is because my mom loved it. And it's been close to three years since she passed. And I'll bet it had been a good 8 months since I really cried about it. Sure I can talk and describe how I felt on the day I got the news, or how exactly she died and what of. But I never really think about it. I live in my constant state of denial. I can't believe it's been three years. I just was sad yesterday about all that she's missing out on. Brian and I are thinking of starting a family soon and she'll never hold her grandchildren... I'd better stop. I'm not really up to starting all this again. I'm going to have a better day today.

Getting my haircut, that's always fun.

Hope all is well out there.


M*J*C said...

Hi Kelly! I definitley have days where I set out to do a certain amount, and end up coming short. As a matter of fact, tonight was one of those days. Should have done 7 miles, did 5.5 instead. I'm having an issue with my oblique (random, I know!), so I didn't want to make it any worse. Don't be so hard on yourself! You got out there!!!
I think it's great that your Mom's love for running and swimming is your inspiration for giving it all a try. It's a beautiful way to celebrate her.

Ryan said...

I came across you blog from I just have to say just keep trying. It took me a while to build up to distance when I first started running. Just keep at it. I not very good at inspirational quotes so just put on foot in front of the other.